Oh, Baby.

No- not me.

But feels like everyone else. I think I've reached the age of the baby boom. My google reader and facebook feeds have been overrun with babies. I'm not complaining, just making an observation. Two friends of mine blog regularly about their lives as parents,
Simplicity in the Suburbs and Soft and Steel. I've been reading about their experiences for the past few years literally watching their kids grow up via posts and pictures. But up until recently, that was sort of it for my friends with kids. Now, FB has turned into a baby announcement center. I don't know when this all happened. I never really even had a wedding boom among friends, but it looks like it just skipped right to babies.

As Adam and I have been together for the last 9 years (today!) and married for over 3 now, we gets asked about when we're going to take that plunge. The thought used to scare me, but as I'm getting surrounded by it online, it doesn't feel as scary as it used to. Still scary of course, but not as much. We have friends telling us to travel and wait as long as we can, and then we have friends telling us, "but don't wait too long". I know there isn't a road map for this, but sometimes, it would be nice if there were. I know I wouldn't be thinking about any of this if I wasn't constantly getting updates about babies on one social network or another. But now that I am thinking about it, I wonder if I'll be able to stop...

Feeling exhausted.

I was talking with one of my really good friends yesterday about all the prep that I needed to get done for the funeral at the end of the week and she made a comment that she didn't know how I did it all. You know what, I have no idea how I keep running and running and literally running. I feel like I'm an all or nothing sort of person. Either I'm doing something non stop, or I'm doing absolutely nothing. There really isn't an in between with me. The past few weeks, I have been getting up early to work out in the morning. If I don't do it in the morning, I rarely get to it later. Thankfully my morning workouts help keep me sane and I don't get as stressed out during the work day as much. But of course, me staying up late to watch Jimmy Fallon, finish work, or do homework takes a toll on my sleep time, so I need to work on that one... I've also been monitoring my food intake pretty rigidly as I'm still doing weight watchers, so that's just another thing to keep me occupied. Perhaps the fact that I'm 30 days away from classes being over just makes it so that much harder to get through the final push of work that I have to do. I have a research paper that I need to research and write, but I feel like I'm running out of time on it. I'm sure once I sit down and do it, it will come together, but I just need to sit down long enough to focus on it. Yesterday was just an emotionally draining day. My mom called me in the morning to let me know about Terry and then the news just sunk in as the day progressed. If I kept my mind occupied, I was okay, but as soon as I was left alone with my own thoughts, I wanted to cry. So, then I would spend all my energy trying to focus on what I was trying to do, yet failing miserably. Now I'm just rambling about anything that is coming into my head... wonderful blog post.

On a completely random note, we just found out a 4th girl in my grad school class is pregnant! One had a baby last summer, not two are due this summer and one in the fall. Now the question is, who's next. For some reason, they keep throwing me out as the next one. I would like to take this opportunity to say that that it will NOT be me. I am very much looking forward to having a life again, and not having kids until I'm 30... maybe earlier, but certainly NOT while I'm still 26. Geez.